View in browser

Issue #24  // The Power of Yet 💪

via @imgflip

From Melia:

Every once in a while, I read a book and want to shout its lessons from the mountaintops. It’s that mind-blowing.

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success is one of those books. The author, Dr. Carol Dweck, is a Stanford psychology professor and pioneering researcher in the field of human motivation. She studies why people succeed and how we can foster success. When you learn about Dweck’s theory of two different mindsets, it will explain a lot about how you respond to challenges in life.

With a fixed mindset, you see intelligence and talent as static. You either have them, or you don’t. Challenges threaten to unmask your flaws and turn you from a winner into a loser. And a loser is forever.

With a growth mindset, intelligence and talent can be developed. You can become much smarter and more skilled through effort and practice. Challenges (and the mistakes and failures that typically result) are an opportunity to get better and better. Your ability now doesn’t determine your ability in the future.

As I’m reading the book, I’m resonating with example after example of someone with a fixed mindset. I don’t like doing things I’m not immediately good at; I avoid taking risks so I won’t look dumb or incompetent. I take mistakes and failures hard, because they feel like a referendum on my abilities and worth. I excelled in school but have often struggled with adult life, which often requires charting your own path into the unknown.

This awareness is painful; life would be so much easier if growth mindset came more naturally to me. But Dweck is clear that it can be learned, and it’s something I’m cultivating every day. When I think, “I can’t do this,” I add “YET.” (See “The Power of Yet”, one of Gill’s and my favorite anthems.) When I feel weak or unskilled in a certain area (ahem, money management), I’m working on turning toward the challenge with curiosity instead of avoiding it with anxiety.

I’m also modeling the growth mindset for my kids so they have it from the start. When Evan gets frustrated that Kung Fu is hard, I tell him, “Everything is hard before it gets easy.” Darren and I make a point of praising him and Avery for their effort, their perseverance, and their improvement rather than their intelligence or talent (as Dweck writes plainly, “That has failed. Don’t do that anymore.”).

The human mind is incredible, and we still don’t know its limits. If you have a fixed mindset in any area, even if it’s been that way for decades, you can change it. Start cultivating your growth mindset by reading this Farnam Street piece summarizing Dweck’s work, or watch her TED talk. Then we can shout her research from the mountaintops together. 🙌

🎙 Latest Minisode: What Depletes and Recharges You

If we don’t make time for the activities that rejuvenate us, we head toward burnout – and that doesn’t serve us or others around us.

Think about it like this: you’re like a character in a video game, and certain things (or people) power you up or down. We share some things that deplete and recharge us – plus ways to replenish your energy.

👉 Steal This Tip: Figure out which activities recharge you.

By employing a few simple strategies, you can find at least a few minutes a day, every day, for activities that replenish the fuel in your tank.

Download our free workbook: How to Make Time for What Fuels You


Episode #25: Perfectionism & Self-Compassion🎙

Perfectionism is self-defeating and harmful, and its antidote is self-compassion. We share research on the dangers of perfectionism, our own experiences with it, and strategies to help manage it.

Listen to the episode.

😄 Things We Text Each Other

via @loveisblindtv

😍 Stuff We Love Right Now

On the Interwebs  🖥

From Melia: 

  • The Importance of Dancing Like an Idiot
    I’ve talked on the podcast about my 20 for 2020 goal of dancing and singing every day. Usually this means telling the Echo, “Alexa, play ‘Worth It' by Fifth Harmony” while I run the kids’ bath and dance like a loon around their room. This piece gets philosophical about why dancing with abandon helps us humans to stop taking ourselves so damn seriously, especially in groups: “On a dance floor filled with comparable idiots, we can at last delight in our joint foolishness; we can throw off our customary shyness and reserve and fully embrace our dazzling strangeness and derangement.” Thanks to Margaret Pinard for sharing! (Side note: I have only scratched the surface of the treasure trove of wisdom that is The School of Life.)

From Gill: 

On Our Screens & In Our Ears  📺  🎧

From Melia: 

From Gill: 

  • The Expanse
    I just finished listening to the audiobook of Leviathan Wakes by James S. A. Corey (pen name for co-authors Daniel Abraham and Ty Franck), the first book in The Expanse series, on the recommendation of Melia's husband Darren. I've never read much sci-fi, but I'm a new convert if the rest of the genre is like this. Diverse, multifaceted characters; a complex world in which humanity has colonized Mars and other parts of the solar system; questions of right and wrong, good and evil. I’m excited to read the next book and start the TV series.

On Our Plates   🍽 

From Melia: 

  • Pantry Recipes 
    Budget Bytes has been one of my favorite cooking blogs for years because of its delicious and inexpensive recipes made from ingredients you’ll likely have on hand. This is a roundup of recipes, with grocery lists, that you can use for emergency preparedness or just if you want to shop less often.

From Gill: 

  • Pasta with Sardines
    I don’t know why sardines get such a bad rap. They are delicious, affordable, and sustainable little fishies that I always keep on hand. Anchovies, too. Get into it. This pasta with sardines recipe from Tamar Adler’s brilliant book, An Everlasting Meal, is a staple in our house. We rarely have parsley so I omit it, and I like capers and greens so I add ‘em if we’ve got ‘em.

If you like the Semi-Together podcast, why not share the pod with a friend who would enjoy it? You can also become a patron here.  

Until next time! 


Melia & Gill 😘😘

Enjoyed this newsletter? Forward it to a friend!

If you are that lucky friend, subscribe here.

Sed ut perspiciatis unde omnis iste natus error sit voluptatem accusantium doloremque laudantium, totam rem aperiam, eaque ipsa quae ab illo inventore veritatis et quasi architecto.


3000 Old Canton Rd. Ste. 455, Jackson, MS 39216
United States

You received this email because you're a subscriber. We're glad you're here!