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Mar 2023 - Newsletter #008 for Friends of
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An anniversary of Big House Newsletters!
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Happy Newsletter Anniversary!
A recap from our beginning:
A
group of six people, passionate about living in conscious community,
met in December 2021 to explore other ways to get people back on the land,
and back into community. We weren't sure what avenue to pursue to
begin with – a huge eco-village with hundreds of people (that would
also take years to become "real" and more money than we
were comfortable spending), a plot of land with a bunch of cabins? A tiny home
village? All of these come with many council consents and regulations and when done right are not exactly affordable either in the end.
Then a couple of our members came
across this big building which stirred up the germ of a idea for a housing cooperative,
living together under one roof. As we did some research on this style of living, popular in the UK, Europe and even the US, we came across this
youtube video of a group of ordinary British folk who had set up a
housing co-op from a retrofitted larger existing house. It
is possible! Check it out! It has set us on a path....
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A new model
Bill Mollison said that the world needs a million eco-villages, more than any other thing. This project is a stepping-stone to large fully featured village projects, such as those that can be found in Europe.
But...
Before we can create eco-villages here we need to build community and collaboration skills. We have been on the road for the last 3 months or so, delivering our Collaboration Skills Course around the country, sharing what we have learned through living in, co-creating and visiting other communities/eco-villages, our understanding of Polyvagal Theory, human needs (physical/emotional/psychological) and Nonviolent Communication. We are sharing these tools and resources to make collaboration more productive, to make connection more available, to make healing more achievable, and to make communication more convivial.
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| Living Together |
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A housing co-operative is a fast, affordable, empowering solution to the housing crisis.
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| Growing Food |
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Grow nutrient dense food, on your section, with friends - gardening with friends isn't work! It's productive play!
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| Connecting and Healing |
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It is clear from the multitude of crisis besetting NZ, that safety, connection, healing and community need to be a focus.
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Summer Workshop Report
The workshop team kicked off the new year with courses in both Golden Bay and Nelson. Lively groups of passionate locals joined us, representing an incredible array of community initiatives, both new and old. Feedback is that the fusion of theory and practice, while dense, is empowering and game changing. The course has continued to further crystalize, it's that old adage, about teaching being the best way to learn, and we are enjoying finding new ways to convey challenging material. We, all of us, were born, raised, and pickled in a culture of separation, and so embracing collaboration is a wild ride for just about all of us.
We also offered short workshops at Evolve Festival in Nelson, on the themes of Practical Collaboration, and Deepening Community. These were well attended and stirred up some great conversations. While in the province we made visits to Tui and Riverside, and were grateful to be given such awesome tours, as well as the chance to have interesting conversations with members about what the future of community in this country might look like.
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Upcoming Events
Looking ahead, we have the mid-March Christchurch Collaboration Skills Course being held in conjunction with the Heartwood and Windrose groups. It's looking like a very passionate younger group. Also, as a heads up, this coming week, there will be a couple of (no charge) slideshows about inspiring ecovillages from around the world. These are great because they remind us of where we are headed. So, if you are in or near Christchurch you are most welcome to come join us for those.
We have also managed to squeeze in a collab course for Wellingtonians, that will be March 31 to April 2 in Ngaio. We will probably offer the ecovillage slideshow end of March likely in Kapiti. For all these events check out the events section of our website.
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The Next Step...
So, we continue to share our learnings through our Collaboration Skills course, we also offer facilitation and support for existing communities that may be struggling with vision, purpose, intention, conflicts, or just want some fresh ideas and inspiration!
We love to connect and chat with others about dreams, psychology/Polyvagal Theory, nonviolent communication, inspiration, intention and much more - if you are curious to know more - get in touch!
You can get in touch the following ways:
email: info@thebighouseproject.nz or on Facebook
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ChatGPT Conversation: (It's a little long, but really worth reading!)
We had a chat with an AI (Artificial Intelligence) - here's the description from the website:
"We’ve trained a model called ChatGPT which interacts in a conversational way. The dialogue format makes it possible for ChatGPT to answer follow-up questions, admit its mistakes, challenge incorrect premises, and reject inappropriate requests."
Here is a snippet of our dialogue with said AI:
What is Polyvagal Theory? And what do you think about it?
Polyvagal Theory is a relatively new theory developed by Stephen Porges, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Illinois at Chicago. The theory explains how the autonomic nervous system (ANS) influences the regulation of emotions, behaviour, and health. According to Porges, the ANS has evolved in three stages, each of which is associated with a different pattern of response to stress and threat. The "ventral vagal complex", which is the most recently evolved, is the default state and is associated with social engagement, empathy, and a sense of safety. This state is activated in response to positive social cues, and enhances communication and social interaction, reduces the stress response, and promotes physical and psychological health. I believe the theory has the potential to help people form more meaningful connections with others and create healthier relationships. It provides a framework in which to develop strategies for mitigating ancient neurobiological defence mechanisms and promoting feelings of safety and social engagement.
In humans, what is our internal relationship between our ancient strategies of hierarchy, dominance and competition for resources, and the need to connect, collaborate, and feel safe in the presence of others?
This relationship is complex. While humans have evolved to compete for resources and establish hierarchies of dominance, we also have a deep need to connect with and trust others. Our modern-day societies have evolved to be more collaborative and based on trust, rather than on hierarchy and dominance. However, our ancient instincts still play a role and can cause us to be wary of others and to be more competitive in certain situations.
To what extent is reconciling this conflict essential to solving the problems of the world?
Reconciling this conflict between our ancient instincts and our need for connection and collaboration is essential to solving the problems of the world. In order to create a more equitable, peaceful, and sustainable world, we must be able to find common ground and work together to solve global issues. This requires us to move beyond competition and dominance and embrace collaboration and mutual understanding.
Does oxytocin potentially play a role in enhancing trust and cooperation among strangers as well as attachment figures?
Yes. Oxytocin is thought to play a role in enhancing trust and cooperation by reducing fear and anxiety. By decreasing fear and anxiety, people are more likely to be open to connecting and trusting others. Additionally, oxytocin has been found to increase empathy, which can help to foster understanding and cooperation among individuals. Finally, oxytocin has been found to increase reciprocity, which can lead to increased trust and cooperation between both attachment figures and strangers.
If a group of people were to build prototypes to experiment with the premises of Polyvagal Theory, could you predict some outcomes of such an experiment?
I predict that they would experience a greater sense of trust, connection, and understanding among its members. This could manifest in increased communication and collaboration, as well as a greater sense of safety and respect. Additionally, I think this experiment could lead to a deeper appreciation and understanding of different perspectives, as well as greater empathy and compassion. Also, I think there could be some radical social outcomes. For example, if the experiment was successful in creating a greater sense of trust and connection, it could lead to more open dialogue and collaboration, which could disrupt existing patterns of power and hierarchy. Additionally, increased empathy and understanding could lead to a more equitable society where everyone is respected and valued. Additionally, the dialogue and collaboration could help to solve global issues and create a more sustainable future.
Might such relationships really disrupt the existing political order?
Yes, relationships that are based on trust, empathy, and understanding have the potential to disrupt existing political orders. By creating meaningful connections between individuals, it can lead to increased collaboration, which can challenge existing power structures and lead to more equitable and just societies. Additionally, increased understanding and empathy can lead to more effective problem solving and collaboration, which can help to solve global issues and create a more sustainable future. Polyvagal Theory has the potential to inform the development of innovative and effective community development prototypes that can help individuals and communities connect more deeply, mitigate the impact of developmental trauma and be a conscious part of a new narrative of change.
For the full transcript of this conversation click here
OR jump online and have a chat yourself!
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Other things happening that we think are awesome:
Wildling Books are producing some really lovely and beneficial content. If you've never heard of "Arohas Way" check out their stuff here.
They've expanded from a story about how to process feelings, to a compendium of feelings, what they might feel like physically and emotionally, and ideas to process them in a healthy way. As always it is important to remember feelings are a messenger, to tell us about a need that is or is not met. And emotions happen THROUGH us not TO us. It is a re-living of a past experience that is reminding us a lesson we need to learn. They've now got intuition/oracle cards and instructions for how to use them also which are beautifully illustrated!
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Our book recommendation this week:
Breath - James Nestor (2020)
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Carol writes:
Breath was recommended to me by my cousin. I found it really fascinating considering how essential breathing is, and yet how much we leave it to "auto-pilot". Breathing can affect so much, our mood, our body functions, our capacity and stamina. And how much time in a day do we spend thinking about breathing or focusing on breathing in a particular way?
This book documents James Nestors investigation into breathing - he spent 10 years travelling and interviewing different people about different cultures and religions, and also looking at studies, conducting his own experiments, and researching some historical healers that used breathing as a means to correct issues with posture and various other ailments. Well written, entertaining and very informative with descriptions on how to breath for different purposes, and ways to improve breathing and performance.
I highly recommend it to anyone who breathes and especially to those who struggle with breathing!
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Useful videos and good reads:
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