We've all done this at some point.

by Shreya Shenoy

Growing up, the one common piece of advice I received from my beloved friends — and especially Bollywood — is that you should make someone want you without showing them how much you want them back.

“Don't look easy.” And as confusing and stupid as that sounds, you’re lying to yourself if you think you haven’t done this before. And when other people do it — it’s the worst. Like when they text you all day, but get hesitant to meet you in person. Or they’re always unavailable, despite saying they’ll make time for you. Or they never initiate conversations or make plans to meet up — despite telling you that you’re important to them. Or when they can’t make up their mind about your place in their lives, but expect you to cherish them. And sometimes, maybe I'm guilty of doing this too. But you know what? It doesn’t make any sense. Honestly, I don’t like playing games when it comes to dating.

I rarely get someone I like who likes me back. And I’m sure I’m not the only one who experiences this. Isn't it rare to find that someone? Then why play games? It's disrespectful, and it's also a little manipulative. Mixed signals are exhausting — and honestly? A mixed signal is a red flag.

Let's be honest. Personally, playing ‘hard to get’ won’t really lead to a satisfying relationship. If someone wants you just because they can't have you, they'll always keep looking for the next chase in life. Dating is already HARD! It doesn’t need to be complicated further.

So here are my tips on how to quit playing games.

1. Be Honest and Vulnerable

It won’t kill you if you are open about how you feel towards someone. What's the worst that could happen? They'll hear you! I've done it and I'm still alive writing this see. I've told my crush I like them. They said they didn't, and I respected the honesty and moved on.

So be accessible, open, vulnerable about your feelings toward them. Be honest about it, because honesty is HOT. And it will save you from yet another badly written ‘will they won’t they’ plotline.

2. Communicate Directly

You can overcome the initial impulse of pride that wants you to play hard and be direct and open about how you feel. Be a better communicator. Tell them what you’re looking for in this relationship, and ask them if they are too. If they’re not - well, now you know. You get what you give, so be clear and you won’t have to keep reading between the lines. Keep the games for game nights. You aren’t a trophy to be won! Vulnerability is for the brave, but it’s also for the awkward — I can attest to this. It really helps stop the constant overthinking.

And if you are on the other side, don't bother chasing people, cause if they really like you, they’ll let you know.

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