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Is this time of year a source of stress? Here are some travel-related jokes I have been collecting--I hope they'll give you a moment of pure silliness and escape.
I asked a flight attendant if I could change my seat because of an incessantly crying baby next to me.
It turns out you can’t do that if the baby is yours.
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It was mealtime on an airplane, and the flight attendant asked a passenger if he would like some dinner.
“What are my choices?” the passenger asked. “Yes or no,” she replied.
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A vulture walks into an airplane with a rotting animal corpse.
The flight attendant screams, “You cannot bring that on this plane!” The vulture says, “It’s just my carrion."
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What do you call it when you’re sick of being in the airport? Terminal illness
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Where do sharks go on vacation? Finland
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Where do eggs go on holiday? New Yolk City
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Where do the pianists go for vacation? Florida Keys
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How do hypnotists travel when they go on vacation? They use public trance-port-ation.
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Why don't mummies go on vacation? Because they are afraid to relax and unwind.
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Why are elephants such light packers for a trip? Because they always have to carry their own trunk.
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Why can’t basketball players go on vacation? They don’t want to get called for a traveling penalty.
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A photon walks up to the check-in desk at the airport. The agent asks, "Are you checking any bags today?"
The photon says, “No, I’m traveling light.”
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An Englishman walks up to the immigration counter at the Sydney Airport. The officer asks, “Do you have any felony convictions?”
The Englishman replies, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that was still a requirement.”
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How do you know when a date with a pilot is half over? He says, "Well that's enough about flying, let's talk about me!"
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