ChabadMatch Update

Sivan 5779 Edition 34

Two New Engagements!

Two Engagements This Month!

1) Shadchan Cyna Reisman relates: "After seeing the Bochur’s profile, I thought of the Kallah immediately. The profile's thorough information is so helpful in checking important information for compatibility. And compatible they are!!!"

2) Shadchan Shandel Blasberg relates: "I knew both singles for some time. The Bochur contacted me and I did a search for him on ChabadMatch. The Kallah looked like a good match as I knew of her, and Boruch Hashem it worked!"

What Will My Friends Say?

Igros: Most Important Elements to Seek in a Shidduch

10 Iyar, 5711,
Brooklyn, N.Y.

Blessings and greetings,

In response to your letter of 13 Nissan — which was received after a slight delay — in which you mention that several possible matches for shidduchim have been suggested to you and that you cannot decide alone because you are not sufficiently satisfied [with the names that have been offered]. This also holds true regarding the suggestion presently under consideration in which initial inquiries have already been made.

When I was at the gravesite of my revered father-in-law, the Rebbe זצוקללה"ה, נבג"ם, זי"ע, I mentioned you, [asking] for a blessing in everything that you need. He will certainly arouse mercy so that you will be able to establish yourself appropriately in the very near future.

With regard to your doubts: Consider how a physical house is built: Even though its externals are beautified, what is of primary importance is that it be built on a strong foundation, using strong materials that are appropriate for the people who must live in it and not [just] for the sake of appearance to passersby in the street.

How much more so should these principles apply to building a Jewish home. Of primary importance is that it be built on a strong foundation of Torah as [studied and practiced] with the fear of Heaven, for the Torah is called “the Torah of life.” In simple words, that name implies that the Torah provides a way of life for one’s day-to-day [affairs]. What “passersby in the street” think about the external beauty [of the home] is entirely secondary. [True,] human nature is such that whether a person is “happy with his portion”1 or not is [often] measured against [such opinions]. Nevertheless, ultimately, these are secondary matters when compared to the primary ones mentioned above.

Since you come from a chassidic family and have certainly been educated in this spirit, it is surely superfluous to elaborate on these statements and or to adapt them [to make them more palatable]. You are surely already familiar with them. By contemplating them, you can clarify for yourself your position and your opinion regarding the suggested matches being offered to you. May G‑d lead you in a straight path, [enabling you] to build a Jewish home on the foundations of the Torah and its mitzvos as they have been explained and illuminated by the teachings of Chassidus.

I hope that you will soon bring me good tidings regarding your situation. With blessing,


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