Friends
The school photo! Do you remember those days? I guess we don't always appreciate the people around us when we're in the thick of it; in our formative years. But somehow, together, we got through the secondary school years and developed into, what ... "fine human beings"? It's a bit syrupy, but I always carry an ear-worm from school days, theme tune to the US sitcom, 'FRIENDS'. "I'll be there for you (When the rain starts to pour) I'll be there for you (Like I've been there before) I'll be there for you ('Cause you're there for me too)".
In Session 3 of our Living in Love & Faith course, we considered 'Relationships' and were asked; 'In which of your friendships do you feel most ‘at home’ and able to
share, most fully, the things that matter to you? Can you identify some
of the reasons why? / What has held you back from making close friendships? If you were
to list the reasons in order of difficulty, what would be on your list?' We thought about intimate friendships in the bible : similar age and background (e.g. David and Jonathan), different ages
and ethnicity (e.g. Israelite Naomi and her Moabite daughter-in-law, Ruth). Friendships shape our identities. Good relationships help us to flourish and grow. "They give us insight into others and contribute to our
self-understanding."
One of the most beautiful things I've read about friendship, is Páudraig Ó Tuama's re-telling of his early life. He was working in religion and "over-full of faith and fear" - faith kept him fearful, sometimes; "Especially because I was gay and had told few people". In his late 20s, on a drive back from a Conference, he told Glenn, a dorm leader on a church camp when Páudraig was 11. "I wasn't sure what he'd say. We continued in a lot of silence. When we parked, he turned to me and said, "What you've said changes me". Not words of acceptance or comfort, though those followed after. But Glenn acted differently. He manifested change in a way Páudraig could never have imagined. Glenn lost friends because of it. Glenn took Páudraig seriously enough that he began to take himself seriously. "He changed me in the way he changed. Glenn saw change as the demonstration of faithfulness, not the denial of it. I carry him in my heart."
"I do not call you servants any longer ... but I have called you friends." WOW! The one loved by the Father; sent by the Father; who talks to the Father ... calls US friends! Chosen & appointed to know that same divine love and to show that same divine love. We are changed through friendship with Jesus. I wonder if what we say & do 'changes' God?
rev'd david harknett
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