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Reality of an Unreal Mind

When I feel trapped, when I feel as if I have my back to a wall, I write.

It has always been my savior. It has always been there and gotten me through. Writing has seen me through hell beyond telling. So when I started to feel a darkness growing behind me, the only thing I could think of to do was what I always do. I started to write.

My subject this time was not Aaron the Marked. It was not Peter or Saykobar. I didn’t want to see more of the Raksa Genocide I have been working on, or any other section of my world. It has always been a source of power for me and I have used it many times to fix what was wrong. This time I needed something more direct.

I’m not a man who plays chicken with deadlines. I don’t like to wait ’til the last minute on anything. So last year, I wrote two years’ worth of blogs. I wanted to write them so I didn’t have to focus on that area of my work life and I could just concentrate on the world I am building and the story that sits within my books waiting. There was plenty to do there, so last December, I took care of two years. After this year, I began to feel something else.

If you have been keeping up with my blog, you know I have been telling the story of my life and my struggle with DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder). I have been talking a lot about its effect on me and giving my readers a glimpse into the events and the trials that have made me the man I am today. I have been doing this for a while.

I decided this year I would compile them all into one tome. This year, over Thanksgiving break, Bekah and I read through all of it, got a look at what was there and decided what was missing.

I wrote. I wrote a new section to the book, telling the story of my education and the events, places, and people that made me who I am.

It was a heartbreaking and gut-wrenching story of loss, bullying, and violence. It was a story about a boy beaten and a boy rising. It nearly broke me to write it. I spent hours beyond telling putting it together, and when I was done with it, I was raw.

I am still raw. I am still not alright. The work has left me breaking down every few hours and barely keeping it together. It was the hardest writing I have ever done, and I can tell you that I was able to capture it. All my heroes, all my villains, all of the horrible and wonderful people who made me this man during my education are captured in this tome.

Along with the other books I will be putting out next year, I will be releasing Reality of an Unreal Mind, Vol. 1: Teardrop Road. It is a rare book, as it is a first-hand account of the disorder I suffer. Not many people who suffer from this disorder are capable of writing a book. I am lucky in that I was able to and I am sharing my story.

Look for the first volume of my autobiography next year. I have no idea when it will be ready. All I know is that I have found an editor in the mighty and talented Sarah Chorn, I have secured photography taken by Anthony Powers, and the unstoppable Shawn T. King will design the cover.

Keep an eye out for the heartbreaking tale of survival and realization of self in Reality of an Unreal Mind, Vol. 1: Teardrop Road.

Paperback Proof Winner!

This month I randomly chose a newsletter subscriber to win Onslaught of Madness’s PROOF. 

And the winner is......

DJ Atkins 

Congratulations, DJ!
I'll contact you directly to arrange shipping details. 

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The Savage is the gift I give to any who sign up for my newsletter. If you haven't already, download it and enjoy. It picks up where Dead Girl left off, and is meant to be read after Legends of the Exiles. 

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Jesse Teller, 2443 S. Ventura Ave., Springfield, MO  65804 USA

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