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Just finish the damn book. I heard that phrase in my head. It was weeks ago now. And though I didn’t know who had said it, I knew exactly what book they were talking about. My autobiography, Reality of the Unreal Mind, had three volumes. Volume 1: Teardrop Road came out a little over a year ago. Volume 2: Normal Street, not much further after that. And then there was The Keep. 

The Keep is built like the Middle Ages. There’s a section called "The Progenitor." It talks about the leadership and the legacy of my family. "The Round Table" is a collection of stories about men who have made an impact in my life. "The King’s Concubine" talks about the near misses that me and Bekah had all of our lives, times when we got so close but didn’t quite make a relationship out of the story. "The Shieldmaidens" is like "The Round Table," only here are stories about the women who changed and formed the man I became. "The Descendants" are stories about my sons, the ways that I’m raising them, and the house they live in. "Bards and Scribes" talks a lot about the people in my life who are part of the writing community I move around in. Then there's "The Kingdom." "The Kingdom" is all about the work. The book finishes with "In the Name of the Father," where I lay out all my experiences with God. It tells the entire story of my spiritual journey, and then before I finished the book, I fasted.

The fast was three days long. I abstained from caffeine, nicotine, sex, and food. I drank only water, a little over a gallon a day. I wore a white shirt every day. Day one was uncomfortable but I was pretty sure I had it beat. Walking around the house with my beautiful wife and being unable to touch her was a challenge. After I started to get hungry, the last thing I was thinking about was cigarettes. I had a caffeine crash, but the water kept me rejuvenated. I thought I had it beat.

It was the second day. I couldn’t be around my family while they were eating, so I couldn’t be at the dinner table, where we talk and spend time together. I ended up just laying in bed all day. My whole body hurt. I couldn’t sleep because of my 48-hour cycle, so all I could do was lay and hurt and talk to God, and I was furious. I had laid out, over the last month, every problem I had with him, every way that our relationship had soured. And there in that bed, I just rolled around in my anger and pain. My body grew weak. 

The next day, I kind of hit a stride. I wasn’t really hungry anymore. I wasn’t thinking about food. I kept watering myself and things kept falling away. I took communion with two people in good standing with their church. And then I came home and cleared everything off my desk to make an altar of it. Only the computer stayed. 

The plan was to demand answers, to stand before God and ask for some accountability for the things that had happened in my life. But after three days of not eating, I was too weak to be mad. All I could do was just talk. I had a conversation with God. He showed up. The things he said, I’d never imagined thinking before. I was talking to another being, a higher being with wisdom beyond anything I could comprehend, and a love that was filling my body and giving me my only strength.

The book is finished. In the end, Adam handed the final draft to Shade. Shade added an artistic touch that Adam had never seen. And then, we just set it free.

Teardrop Road will break your heart. Normal Street will enrage you. And The Keep will heal you. I’m extremely proud of what I’ve done with my autobiography. It’s something no one can take away from me. The time I spent on it is sacred. It took me almost three years to write it. I faced every demon. I talked about every moment of my life with my wife.

We’re ready for the next part.


I’m gonna do it again. I gonna run off and sell books face-to-face with the people. I’ll be at Extremicon. This convention will take me back home to St. Robert. And I don’t know what to expect. There’s a lot of little towns in the area, and Ft. Leonard Wood is right there. I could very easily sell fourteen books all weekend. Or I could sell out. We’re gonna have to see. You’ll hear more about it soon.

The Silent War of the Sour Eye

Here's your access to The Silent War of the Sour Eye. The recently expanded short story collection includes: 

The Banshee
The Slave
The Gilded Mares
Son of the Demontser
The Forge of Souls
The Master of the Hoodsmen

Jesse Teller

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Jesse Teller, 2443 S. Ventura Ave., Springfield, MO  65804 USA

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