my wonderful sycophants.

Yeah, “we” just decided to give it away a little ahead of launch, so with the weather getting a little shitty (for those in the best hemisphere…. That’s right - I fuken went there!) how about “we” give you the gift of a weekend all snuggled in with some wonderful beverages, perhaps a blazing fire (in real life or on the tv) and a cracking little book that you are going to love. Something to help recharge you before the madness of Christmas kicks in.

For those in the lesser hemisphere (Yeah, still there, putting you guys in your place) where it’s sunny as hell? Fuk off back to your lilo where you can float in your outdoor pool and read the best book ever to the calming hum of splashing pool water… you absolute pricks!

(I love that the southern hemisphere are cool as fuk and just laugh off my abuse, right before fuking off to their outdoor pools to float on their lilos and read their…. Yeah, you got it.)

Anyway, wherever in the world you are, enjoy it!!!!!!!!!

FOR FUKEN FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ugh.

No matter how many times I say it, it still hurts.

Even if “we” think it’s a nice gesture.

So, despite my desire to get paid for the grueling months I spent locked away trying to work out how to fool the world into believing I’m actually good at this writing shit….deep sigh…. I just thought repaying some of you complete fuken legends for the years of amazing support you have offered.

Honestly, Raven Rock is my favourite Robert J Power book ever. It kills me that it’s so good and I’m giving it away to you all. But perhaps, that pain is worth a little more. You guys have carried me so far along this road. It’s my turn to return the favour.

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….but….

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….you could always leave an Amazon or Goodreads review when you are done…. Just saying…. No pressure…..

Thankfully, a few of my Alpha readers have already sent me lovely messages about how much they’ve enjoyed the book. You could be like one of those legends. SERIOUSLY!!!! It’s fuken terrifying throwing out a book into the ether wondering if it’s all going to fall apart and am I going to have to go back working in a video store (ask your grandparents).

Truly, your kind words infuse and keep me going. And hey, while you are making my day, you could also tell the world how great it is. Trust me, your messages, posts, emails, reviews, Bebo status’s, all make a significant impact.

Your actions have far reaching consequences!!!!!!

Except when you are voting. Ooh, look at me being all topical because it’s actually election day in Ireland. The politicians who arrive at my door having scaled my badger gates all tell me “everything will be so much better at the low, low price of your vote.” Unlike the quality of Raven Rock, I’m not sure about this. Sometimes I wish the politicians could live the life I live. Sometimes I wish they could live day by day all at the mercy of reviews.

Ooooh, sometimes I wish we could really review politicians. Give them fuken ratings. That would be amazing.

“Two star review. He has a weird face. Was too eager to shake my hand and walk away when I mentioned I knew that Space Aliens were working for the rabid Badgers that occupied high places in the senate. Wouldn’t kiss my dog even though she was wrapped up in her pram. What’s wrong with my dog??? Also, spoiler alert, smelled like cheese but wouldn’t tell me which type. Would not recommend. Will not vote for him… again.”

“Five star review. Said she’s going to work on fixing the bumps on the road outside my house. Doesn’t like badgers either. Said she’s going to buy all my books after election day. Didn’t smell like cheese. Patted my dog’s head. She made the effort. Would recommend voting for her.”

Why are you still reading this drivel?

You’ve already gotten your free shit from me.

Stop reading this.

Please!!!!!!

You are still reading and it’s forcing me to keep writing.

Just exit at the top page!!!!!!!!!

My hand is cramping up and I’m in the middle of a tense game of Balatro at the moment.

Fine.

You want to play this game and keep reading?

I’ll tell you more about Balatro.

It’s a game. A really good game. You will probably like it. I must have put about a hundred hours into it the last few weeks. If you haven’t played it, its only a matter of time. You have been warned.

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This email has finished.

You have a new book to read.

Reviews to submit.

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With a little time off leading up to launch I was all excited to dig into Valheim on my steam deck, but this little bastard card game monster took over. Fuk you Balatro you beautiful bastard!!!

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Coming up to a thousand words now and you are still here.

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These silences are not having the effect I hoped they would……..

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Baby shark?

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I’ve never played a deck builder game in my life… and some people have said Balatro is not really a deck builder… but they could be lying. Regardless, it does involve poker hands and I’m a passionate poker player (especially against computers when I can win)

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Raven Rock ends with a big pie fight.

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That’s what you get.

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Hmmm….

While I’m here being forced to keep writing, I have a question.

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I’m in between books so if anyone is reading something interesting or has recommendations, I’d love to get your advice.

I’m tired.

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I just got a really good card that triples the score of my flush hands. I’m going for the win.

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You are still reading.

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You have beaten me.

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Enjoy the book guys.

You are the best.

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Take care of yourselves, and each other.

The ROB

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I just lost the game on the final boss blind.

Fuk it anyway.