Stress Management Monthly Newsletter

1. Sale of the Month

The landmark education book, Discipline without Stress® Punishments or Rewards has 54 reviews on with 87% ranking the book with 5 STARS. This hardbound comprehensive education book is now on sale at a 50% discount ($18.98 vs. $35.95). Three of the chapters "Classroom Meetings", "Collaboration for Quality Learning", and "Reducing Perfectionism" are available for free reading here.

2. Quote of the Month

3. Parenting Without Stress

Focusing on discipline is something parents do every day. But sometimes it seems no matter what you do or say, the children never learn to change their ways.

Here’s a secret: Whenever something a child does bothers you, the solution is to teach a procedure. In fact, teaching a procedure is one of the best ways to focus on promoting responsibility.  

For example, if your child continually leaves clothes on the floor, teach a procedure—and then have the youngster practice it.

You can teach a procedure for virtually anything.

For example if you have a number of youngsters and their loud noise bothers you, teach a procedure for noise levels. Example:

Level 0 – Silence

Level 1 – Partner voice; only the person you are talking to should hear you.

Level 2 – Group voice; the voice you use when talking with a small group.

Level 3 – Lecturing voice; the voice you use when speaking to a large group.

Level 4 – Playground voice; this is the voice when you are outside playing games.

Level 5 – SCREAMING; this voice is what you use when you are hurt or in danger. The only time you might use this voice when you are not in danger is when you are cheering for a sports team.

Tip: If anything bothers you, TEACH A PROCEDURE. Just showing can never be as successful as practicing a procedure.

4. Discipline Without Stress

For many years, the term "Hierarchy of Social Development" was used in the Raise Responsibility System.

I have recently begun referring to the image as "Levels of Development."

If you search for the image of "Levels of Development," the image below will appear on the first page of your browser.

The two lower levels refer to unacceptable behavior levels. The two higher levels refer to motivation. The highest Level of Development serves as a rubric for the courage to act responsibly.

5. Living Without Stress

The following excerpt is from the award-winning book, "Live Without Stress."


Abraham Maslow, best known for his theory of psychological health, stated the concept of internal motivation clearly: “Human life will never be understood unless its highest aspirations are taken into account. Self-actualization, the striving toward health, the quest for identity and autonomy, the yearning for excellence, and other ways of phrasing the striving ‘upward’ must now be accepted beyond question as a widespread and even universal tendency.”

Self-actualization is the highest level of Maslow’s well-known Hierarchy of Needs. As we live and have experiences, we are able to differentiate between different types of motivation. And as we mature with age and experiences, there tends to be a natural desire to move toward self-actualization, which can only be achieved through internal motivation. This kind of motivation makes life more meaningful. Level D on the Levels of Development actuates Maslow's concept of self-actualization.

6. Improving Relationships

In order to significantly improve relationships, focus on UNDERSTANDING the other person, rather than attempting to INFLUENCE that person. You will find that agreement is often achieved more quickly with this approach.

Rather than assuming you know the reasoning behind another person’s viewpoint, ask for an explanation. Aim at clarifying—rather than influencingUsing this approach, the person articulates the reasoning, and you many find that the person’s reasoning is well worth considering. You may receive an insight about the other person that will assist you in your discussions and understanding of that person.

Having the other person feel and believe that his/her reasoning is acknowledged—not necessarily agreed with—can have a dramatic influence on changing opinions.

More ideas on this topic are available at


7. Increasing Effectiveness

Refrain from correcting people unless the "error" of what the person is saying is going to embarrass that person, unnecessarily misdirects the conversation, or otherwise may prompt harm.

Most minor corrections are meant to benefit the person making it.

So, reflect: Does it really matter if it was July or August in which someone else's story took place?

8. Promoting Responsibility

Progress comes from making small improvements. “SMALL” is the key word. Just take one step at a time when trying to take on something new. The familiar aphorism states this idea succinctly: Small strokes fell great oaks.

By taking small steps, the brain creates neural networks for change. Small—really small—easily achievable steps is the key for success. For example, if you watched many television programs and knew that a balancing exercise would be beneficial, a first step would be to just stand for one minute on one foot while watching television. Then stand on the other foot. Next week, stand for two minutes each day. Making small advances lets you tiptoe right past thoughts that could prompt negativity.

Unlike youth, who find little risk or problem in attempting new activities, adults have established patterns and often feel anxious and uncomfortable when attempting something new. Realizing this at the outset will make it easier to attempt something new.

Think of a rocket or a space mission. Most of the energy, most of the thrust, has to do with breaking away—to surge past the gravitational pull. Once you get past the pull of your habitual approach, you will steadily become more successful. You will also enjoy the satisfaction of your new successes.

Trust the process. You will soon find that practicing this suggestion will become easier if you focus on one step at a time.

Enjoy! You will!

9. Promoting Learning


The following is excerpted from the book, "WHAT GREAT TEACHERS DO DIFFERENTLY: 14 THINGS THAT MATTER MOST," BY TODD WHITAKER (with some slight editing).

1. Great teachers never forget that it is people that determine the quality of a school.

2. Great teachers establish clear expectations at the start of the year and follow them consistently as the year progresses.

3. When a student misbehaves, great teachers have one goal: to keep that behavior from happening again.

4. Great teachers have high expectations for students and even higher expectations for themselves.

5. Great teachers know who is the variable in the classroom: They are. Great teachers consistently strive to improve, and they focus on something they can control—their own performance.

6. Great teachers create a positive atmosphere in their classrooms and schools. They treat every person with respect. In particular, they understand the power of being positive. (My addition)

7. Great teachers consistently filter out the negatives that don't matter and share a positive attitude.

8. Great teachers work hard to keep their relationships in good repair—to avoid personal hurt and to repair any possible damage.

9. Great teachers have the ability to ignore trivial disturbances in order to respond to inappropriate behavior without escalating the situation.

10. Great teachers have a plan and purpose for everything they do. If results don't work out the way they had envisioned, they reflect on what they could have done differently and adjust their plans accordingly.

11. Before making any decision or attempting to bring about any change, great teachers ask themselves one central question: What will the best people think?

12. Great teachers continually ask themselves: Who is most comfortable and who is least comfortable with each decision? They treat everyone as a good person.

13. Great teachers keep standardized testing in perspective; they center on the real issue of student learning.

14. Great teachers care about their students. They understand that behaviors and beliefs are tied to emotion, and they understand the power of emotion to jump-start change.

10. Stress Management Video

Take some tips from Ben Franklin...

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11. What People Say

"I found out about you at your presentation
in Christchurch, New Zealand (NZ) that I attended.
I teach in a Kindergarten (3-5 year olds) in Invercargill, NZ
and have found your ideas work very well.
I often quote you to my colleagues at work
when we are discussing our children.
Thank you for your ideas."

—Elaine Goodsir - Invercargill, New Zealand

12. Resources

50% OFF!

Discipline Without Stress® Punishments or Rewards: How Teachers and Parents Promote Responsibility and Learning

The hardbound book is now on sale at 50% discount—as long as the book is still available in our warehouse. 

Click to Learn More / Buy ➤

Learn that you ALWAYS stay in authority WITHOUT using bribes to control, threats, imposing punishments, or any other coercive or EXTERNAL motivational approach at

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Dr. Marvin Marshall

PO Box 11
Cypress, CA


Phone: 1.714.220.1882