Six New Engagements this Month!

Shadchanim reported six new enagagements this month! Here are the stories:

1) Shadchan Rus Kinn relates: "I saw the Kallah's profile on Chabadmatch and set her up with someone who was unsuitable, but through that experience came to understand what she was seeking.  When I interviewed the Bochur who seemed just the type for her, I suggested the match and Boruch Hashem they met and got engaged!"

2) Shadchan Chani Raksin relates: "I was working with a girl from ChabadMatch for a while.  After Purim, a mother whose son just started with Shidduchim called me.  I thought of this girl immediately and how suitable she was.  Boruch Hashem it went well and ended in a an engagement!"

3) Shadchan Chani Raksin relates: "I was working with the girl's mother for one a year.  Recently, her resume went on ChabadMatch with more detailed information and I got a better feeling of what boy she needs.  There was a boy who I thought of, I called his uncle for more information, and felt it was very suitable.  BH it ended in an engagement!"

4) Shadchan Atarah Guez relates: "The girl's sister reached out to me to check if I had any ideas for her sister.  I did a search on ChabadMatch and found one suggestion that looked like it could match, he was the perfect match!  After more investigation, I found that they had a lot of similarities, and BH got engaged."

5) Shadchan Yocheved Miller relates: "I like to cross reference when possible, and I always look for the potential match on ChabadMatch if I head about them from any source.  The additional information on the ChabadMatch profile of the boy helped put this Shidduch together!"

6) Shadchan Leah Lipszyc relates: "I saw the Choson's profile on ChabadMatch when he registered years ago.  I've been in touch with his mother all along, and she asked me to look into to the Kallah, after someone mentioned her name to her."

Interview with Crown Heights Shadchan Mrs. Rochel Bryski

Q. How did you get involved in Shidduchim?

A. About twelve years ago I was approached by a local Bochur in Crown Heights who was 25 came over and asked me to help find him a Shidduch. I suggested one girl who said it wasn't a match for her, but suggested that it might be a match for her friend. The Bochur's parents were divorced, I was working with his aunt, and then she told me that other girls were suggested for her nephew, and I should look into them.. That network of names is how I got started. When ChabadMatch started, I was encouraged to register as a Shadchan. One of the Bochurim  from Australia, who was registered on the site, reached out to me, and I thought one of the girls on that list I was building could match. Boruch Hashem, that suggestion worked and gave momentum to keep working. During the Kinus Hashluchim one year I approached a Shliach from Europe and asked him if he has kids that needed Shiduchim, he told me he has a boy and a girl that are ready, I matched up his boy with a local girl from Crown Heights. After they got engaged, a Shliach in the FSU asked me if I can meet with a nice bochur that he was Mekarev who learned in our Yeshivos in Israel and help find him a shiduch. I set up the Bochur with the daughter of the Shaliach from Europe, and he was able to marry off both his son and daughter within a few weeks in Crown heights.

Q. What Shidduchim do you specialize in?

A. I don't specify myself to any specific groups, but I have spent time and effort working with older singles. It can sometimes be a more difficult process.

Q. What advice do you have for singles?

A. Many times I see people focused too much on height, age, and parent's background, while not focusing on important factors such as Frumkeit, life outlook, and Chassidishkeit. There are things that singles may never even discuss while going out, only to discover after marriage for example that their spouse does not want Negel Vaser by the bed. Going out is the time to discuss these details. It's important to also focus on how you would like to raise your future children, and how a person deals with anger. People have gotten divorced or have had difficult marriages because they skipped looking into these details beforehand. I also heard from one Shadchan who suggested that a date should not last more than 3 hours. The reason is twofold:
1) You may run out of things to say, and that can lead to an awkward feeling during the date.

2) It's better to end a date on a good note, with both sides feeling there was more to discuss, and looking forward to the next date, as opposed to being exhausted.

Rabbi Keller can be reached by email at yykeller@gmail.com.

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