ChabadMatch Update

Sivan 5776 Edition 1

Automated Suggestions are Live!

We are excited to launch automated suggestions on the site this month. Chayim our dedicated programmer has spent the last 6 months fine-tuning  our proprietary algorithm to help match profiles. In the initial beta stage, Shadchaim will receive suggestions that match, being able to view both profiles side by side. Make sure you have at least one Shadchan associated with your profile so they will receive these suggestions, and be on the lookout for these suggestions from your Shadchan!

Is There Really a Shidduch Crisis? By: Rabbi Manis Friedman

I often hear single people not only complain about being single, but also about the fact that many of their friends can’t seem to get married as well. I can’t get married and she can’t get married and she can’t get married. There must be a crisis! Before we address this subject, I think it is relevant to mention a story that occurred some years ago.

A series of tragedies befell the Montreal Jewish community in a very short time. Numerous people wrote letters to the Lubavticher Rebbe proclaiming that “everything is going wrong.” There seemed to be one misfortune after another. He was asked what could potentially be the cause of this phenomenon. The Rebbe replied that goodness works in groups. Kedusha works in groups. But kelipa – the opposite of holiness – does not cooperate. Bad never cooperates with bad. This teaches us that bad things are incapable of working together. Therefore, we must steer clear of classifying them as part of one unified negative whole. If three bad things happen, they are three independent, separate, unrelated events. One is not connected to the other. There is no “conspiracy” at work. But we’re very prone to suspecting a conspiracy whenever things don’t go our way.

And this brings me back our original topic.

Is there a “shidduch crisis?” The entire question is counterproductive. What would a shidduch crisis have to do with you? It’s not like a group of single women got together and decided: “Let’s make a crisis.” The fact that there are other people who are still unmarried has nothing to do with you. And isn’t it remarkable just how quickly the crisis vanishes once you get engaged? Don’t think of yourself as part of a “crisis” and don’t subscribe to ‘group-think.’ You don’t get married as a group and you don’t stay single as a group. Getting married is not a group project.

It’s time to stop thinking in “crisis” terms and to start thinking as an individual.

Finding your bashert is a private matter that is only between you, your future husband, and G-d.

Shadchan Up Close: Mrs. Sukie Rubin of London, UK

Mrs. Sukie Rubin of London, England works mainly with young 19-29 Chabad singles who have been through the system, completed seminary, and are back to London and looking for their Bashert. She mainly works with girls but also with a few Bochurim.

Mrs. Rubin adds: "My objective is to find a way to help girls get engaged before reaching 25+ and losing trust in Shadchanim finding their Bashert. Fellow Shadchanim please send your boys the way of English girls who are happy to relocate and even travel for Shidduchim. I can give many examples of English singles marrying Americans. London is only 2 hours further traveling distance to NY compared to LA!"

Mrs. Rubin can be reached by email at sukierubin@gmail.com or via What's App: +44-79569-82451.

Dating Course

Use coupon code: Chabadmatch to receive a 60% discount on Rabbi Manis Friedman's 3-Part Teleseminar for Bochurim and Girls.

 

Three New Engagements in Iyar!

Shidduch #115: Shadchan Leah Namdar relates: "The mother of the Bochur called asking for an idea. I browsed ShluchimMatch and found a girl's name that seemed really Shayach. I sent it to the mother and after a few meetings, through Hashem's great kindness, there is a Mazal Tov! The beauty of the ChabadMatch & ShluchimMatch system is that is completely eliminates the waiting time and holdup that ensues over resume exchanging. All the info is there and the research can be done without any delay or discomfort."

Shidduch # 114Shadchan Moishe Raitman relates: "Chabadmatch database was instrumental in providing detailed information about both individuals to evaluate common interests, personalities and hashkafa standards and provided excellent references for checking."

Shidduch #113: Shadchan Rus Kinn relates: "With great help from Above, after seeing the young lady's profile on ShluchimMatch, I suggested her to someone who had been in touch with me through ChabadMatch. The match was unsuitable, but because of his effusive praise for the girl's family and character, she was on my mind. When a new ShluchimMatch profile came through, of a bachur who had been here in Manchester for Yeshiva and had run programs that my boys took part in, knowing his character traits, I thought it may well be a match. And it was!"

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